Give your you a chance by Tofunmi

The first time  I watched BOTCHED a reality show on channel 124, It was quite interesting to know how often we are reminded of our shortcomings and how far people are willing to go to meet up with social standards .We cannot escape the constant reminders of how we can always become someone else, and how much we don’t have to wallow in self-pity when we do not feel comfortable with our looks and appearances.

In magazines it is often brought to our notice how we can get Michelle Obama’s arms, or Cameron Diaz’s Abs or follow Britney’s quick weight loss plan, how we can slay Beyoncé’s dress and several other before and after looks to pick from. These standards say that we are only attractive if we have certain physical attributes and skin colour ,  especially with the advent of social media  that shows a wide array of celebrity and celebrity wanna- be lifestyles that  dictates how we live and how we look;  a prototype for our life.

As technology advances we are not limited to simply changing workouts or getting new haircuts!  We are being informed on cosmetic surgeries, soothing body creams and beauty machines to give us that desired Hollywood/Nollywood look; having an alarming rate of ladies who have completely relinquished their natural look for a more desirable look.

Botched opens up a lot cases made up of people with wacky, crazy and sometimes heart- wrenching stories of plastic surgeries that went bad.  Some could be rectified while some will have to live with the damage for the rest of their lives. Women asking for collagen injections to get Angelina Jolie’s lips but ended up with permanent swollen lips, a particular lady could flip her butts implant inside out.  There has also been records of these craziness here in Nigeria we have heard of awful stories of ladies who have  used chemicals , relaxers , cosmetics , body creams,  oblivious of the side effects and damages .

It is quite alarming here,where we have a lot cosmetologist who are not even certified, or know anything about skin types and treatments but yet still proffer skin solutions and treatments.

Amidst these  why are we trying to look like someone else in the first place?  Is it a function of a desirable social acceptance or a dysfunctional self-esteem ? This could be a self-esteem issue , very often we cannot convince ourselves  out of negative self-image that beclouds our sense of judgement and reasoning .

Its high time we realised there will never be another person  like us ,  we should not doubt our uniqueness or want to change ourselves , it is very wrong to give up on our most important , most valuable and (IMO) most sacred project – YOU .  That person we so desire to be like has a turmoil and frustration too,  keep in mind you only see what he or she wants you to see .

Most of the time , mimicking others and wanting to live a different kind of life leads no where , people often do not take the right steps and actions to make changes in their lives .

Think of the freedom and peace we  could experience in our lives just being who we are,  not trying to be what we think we are supposed to be , in other to get the things we think we are supposed to want . We are wonderfully made ,  at times it could be our souls that needs a surgery .

Give your YOU  a chance , get to know YOU  there maybe more to YOU than you think .





  1. You are so right, we need to give ourselves a chance to explore who we really are. Like the song goes: “I am not your expectation”

  2. Couldn’t have been said better! The desire to become like others is now construed as “loving oneself”- which arguably implies doing whatever you wish to and for yourself. While I have no issues with those who go the extra mile to “remodel” themselves, as raised in the article, I fear for their psychological well-being. If remodeling yourself is what gives you joy, so be it! But do not in any way let it limit YOU. Moreoever, whatever happened to accepting yourself the way you are? Well, the answer is “social constructivism” (which most of us a guilty of). What the society labels as the standard is what is the standard but then, it fades again and so does the YOU who followed the crowd.You pick up the next trend, it fades and so it goes on and on. Never let society make or mar YOU. Be YOU, be guided by YOU and stand by YOU.

    Thanks for this Tofunmi. We sometimes need to be jolted back to the reality that our flaws are what make us unique.

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